Sunday, August 28, 2005

urgency abound

The titanium lifters needed in a crucial portion of this “Death Star’s” planet-killer ray beam arrived yesterday, and the men have been laboring in tremendous efforts to meet the deadline posted. We have also been rapping our heads together to agree upon a new name for the contraption, for, I fear the name I have chosen has become quite the celebrity in talking points around the station, and with much embarrassment I see. I would generally not be pushing so hard on such a project that is years from completion, but with the advent of my soon –to-be ex-wife’s re-emergence on scene, I am strongly anticipating a point in time where I can blow that friggin’ planet of Alderon out of existence.

Recently, my ex has contacted the Senate in regards to the beating laid upon Mitch and his permanent vegetative state. She is fighting to enact a law prohibiting what she feels is discrimination towards her new man, now that he can no longer do any work to support himself. She is demanding the Senate step in and force his former employer, Senator Organa himself, to resume Mitch’s original salary on a permanent basis, even though he can no longer work. I don’t know. Personally, I don’t see the point, but all the more reason to destroy that fu#%ing planet. If they buy in to her lunacy over this whole incident brought on by Mitch, himself, then it is only a matter of time before they look to start drafting his disability out of my salary. Now you understand my urgency to complete this Planet-killer ray beam thing. Those damn Organas!

4 Comments:

Blogger Anakin Skywalker said...

I thought you was gonna go with the "Deathticle" for the name, G.

7:14 PM  
Blogger Grand Moff Tarkin said...

Deathticle?.. interesting. I will give it some thought. Fortunately, I still have several more years to toy around with the name, before it is actually operational. Thanks though.


The Tarkster

9:25 PM  
Blogger jedisiri said...

yeah "deathicle" sounds cool.*nod*

11:32 PM  
Blogger Anakin Skywalker said...

I got a few more.

Giant Hurt Ball
Sphere O'Fear
Death Moon
Planet Death

10:15 PM  

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